Day three of my lifestyle change sees me following strict written instructions on taking my 12 week old grand puppy to Puppy School lessons. Daughter number one’s driving directions went well until ‘turn left at next roundabout’ – no, it wasn’t the next roundabout, more like the fourth roundabout. This one slight error on her part caused a 15 minute late arrival to puppy school, and had reduced me to a not so pleasant mood (my pet hate is tardiness – cannot tolerate it from anyone, especially me). Which I then ashamedly took out on the puppy. Comments like ‘no Lucy, I am NOT in the mood for your disobedience’ soon made me realise I was turning into a ‘grumpy old woman’ – I lightened up when I saw that my puppy was by far more obedient than all the others!
Not only was she the fastest learner (a grandmother’s bias), but the most boisterous at playtime at the end of the lesson. The smaller puppies cowered between their owners legs as she bounded up to them, the bolder ones soon succumbed to her dominant manner and politely rolled onto their backs in the submissive position, as she stood straddled above them in a victorious stance – looking around for my approval. Who knew that I would find myself apologising for my grand puppy’s bullying behaviour?
An easier trip home to drop off the puppy who thankfully had worn herself out, and I headed to an Arts and Crafts market at a nearby beachside suburb. I love these local markets, it’s always fun browsing through other people’s junk they’re trying to get rid of. And never buying anything.
That’s not entirely true – I once picked up a copy of Spike Milligan’s book ‘Adolf Hitler – My Part In His Downfall’ for 10p when I lived in Hastings, UK. I knew my comedian-lover of the time would love it – he did. He also loved the drive I took him on to a gorgeous little village called Winchelsea and dragged him through the cemetery to show him Spike Milligan’s grave.
His obituary reads “I told you I was ill” – I love that, I’m going to use it on mine.
With my sausage on a roll and drink in hand (supporting the local fire brigade), I settled down to watch the entertainment – an old timer’s jazz band whose combined ages must have been close to a thousand years old. But they could play!
An interesting chat to a local artist who collects rubbish off the beach and turns it into works of art gave me some great ideas for a new hobby. Or I might just post my rubbish collection to my zany artist friend on the Gold Coast and tell her I’ve sent her a present.
A couple of enquiries located the organiser of the markets who had agreed to let me set myself up somewhere to promote my book, and hopefully sell a few copies.
The cupcake stand girls were just packing up, so I was allocated their table (and a couple of cupcakes) and put my books on display.
The only interest in my book came from all unsuitable readers – a young mum with a couple of kids who sniggered at the title* (you definitely don’t want your children to get hold of this book, I explained to her), a couple of lesbians who turned their noses up when I explained what it was about ( a romance with a man? Eewww!) and an old timer who loved the title but I feared his ticker wouldn’t have coped with the content! Then the rains came and drove everyone out and back to their cars – including me. Oh well! Still made for a pleasant afternoon. There’s always Sunday morning at a local breakfast café for a book signing.
* Book title is ‘Keep It In Yor Knickers’, Author name is J R Sanders.
I had heard of this dog training method by famed Norwegian dog trainers Morten Egtvedt and Cecilie Koeste called ‘Clickertraining’ and have convinced my daughter to give it a try. She needed it, with two large juvenile dogs to manage – and is having great results!